This is me
by Thecreativeone111
Summary: Cho Chang writes Harry a letter, it’s not an apology it’s not an excuse.


This is me

This is me

Cho Chang writes Harry a letter, it's not an apology it's not an excuse it is just her.

Disclaimer: These characters belong to J K Rowlings they are hers. I just write free fanfiction.

Authors note: I'm expecting flames for this story. But oh well. Please review.

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It was 3:00 in the morning, Cho could not sleep. Her conscious was eating away at her. She was dating Harry, a kind, brave Gryffindor who cared for her very much. He was there for her when Cedric died. He listened to her, held her when she cried and told her everything was going to be alright. She loved the feeling of having someone care about her. Cedric used to do the same thing. Only difference was she loved Cedric. Sure Harry was attractive and brave and a celebrity. But she just couldn't connect with him.

She was going to end it tomorrow. She was going to send him an owl. She couldn't face him. She didn't want to see his hurt eyes look back at her. He knew about her baggage before he even asked to date her. He knew she was high maintenance. He knew she was no good for him.

She often wondered why he dated her. They had nothing in common. She was a Raven claw he was a Gryffindor. She loved academics he hated it. She loved the attention he didn't. He just liked her because of her looks; she was just a pretty face to him. That made it easier, lessened the guilt. If he loved her for superficial reasons maybe he deserved to get hurt. The more she thought about it the more it hurt. Cedric didn't have anything in common with her either, he used to possessively wrap his arm around her waist and she'd smile and laugh at his jokes. He never asked her how she felt.

Sure she had her faults, she was selfish, a compulsive attention seeker and wore her heart on her sleeve. But that's the way she always was. It was her nature. She wasn't a nice girl. She looked the part, yet it just wasn't her.

She wasn't gong to apologies, not this time. She was going to say it how it is. She's a bad person. With that resolution her guilty conscious disappeared for the first time in her life. She got out of bed, making sure not to disturb the other girls and slowly walked to the common room. She sat in the big couch with her note book and pen and began to write.

_Harry_

No dear, he didn't mean that much to her, she was going to be blunt and honest even if it destroyed her.

_I can't be with you anymore. I feel dead and a fake when I'm with you._

Wow, that was harsh she thought to herself, but it was honest her conscious added.

_I haven't been honest for a long time to others and most of all to myself. But that ends today. You have been kind to me, but I feel as if your kindness and friendship came at a price. I had to be this trophy girlfriend who looked pretty at your side. Well that's not me._

_I'm selfish, I'm a drama queen, I'm needy, I'm an attention seeker and I'm a liar. Cedric only was my boyfriend because of my looks; when he died a part of me felt a sense of freedom that I could finally let the facade down and be myself. Then you came around and just like Cedric you expected me to be at your beck and call, treat you like a king, act all subservient and befriend your friends._

_It's not your fault, it isn't I just have crap taste. So this is the end. I hope you have a bright and wonderful future, just don't expect me to play any part in it._

_Cho_

Cho got up and opened the window and blew a little red whistle that only her owl could hear she called for it. As the bird flew in she gave it a biscuit and tied the letter to its leg and gave it instructions to deliver the letter tomorrow morning. As Cho watched the owl fly away she closed the window and went to bed content with her decision and the course her life was taking.

The next morning Cho went to breakfast late, she arrived after all the other students were seated and as she walked in she saw Harry. He motioned for her to sit between him and Hermione. Cho looked at Harry and walked to the Ravenclaw table. She sat next to Luna Lovegood. That's when the letter arrived, Harry got his letter and Cho watched as he opened it. I bet he thinks it's a love letter she thought; maybe a love letter telling him how much she needs him and how she can't live without him. Oh was he wrong. He began to read, his face turned from a smile to a more serious one. She could tell he was re reading it trying to digest it. That's when he looked up and saw her. She was looking at him and he knew this was no prank. Hermione and Ron asked what was wrong; Harry began to get up and gave them no explanation as he left the great hall. All but the letter remained. Hermione picked it up and began to read it out loud to Ron, Ginny and a few other nearby Griffindors. Cho for once in her life did not care, she didn't care as they made there way to her table and the onslaught of insults began. First it was Ginny, then Ron and then Hermione. When Hermione finished completely exhausted. Cho just stood up looked directly into there eyes and smiled. She then walked out into the grounds. Wow was it good to be free.


End file.
